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1000 ways to die cartoon episodes
Season 1 episode 1-look out death is about Ahhh see what happens when your not careful as we show you these outrageous deaths. A con artist gets shredded, a stripper gets shot, two drug dealers get impaled, an aloholic falls to his death, a cowboy gets attacked by hornets, A bug collector gets to close to his bugs, and a genius kills himself. WARNING;the stories portrayed in this show are based on real deaths and are extremely graphic. names have been changed to protect the identities of the deceased. Do not attempt to try any of the deaths deputed. Chances are 99.9 percent that you will die. For younger readers; Just DO NOT TRY IT AT HOME, OR ANYWHERE IN THE WHOLE WORLD! Death is everywhere. Most of us try to avoid it and can't get out of it's way. Everyday we have a new war against germs, toxins, injury, disease, illness and catastrophe.There's a lot of ways to wind up dead. The fact that we survive it all is a miracle because everyday we live we face a 1000 ways to die. ' #1 - Shredder Revenge;' 1- Europe LA Date September 2008 . Daffy was a con artist who spent most of his time lying to one of his colleagues as-a ticket giver. But at one of his other jobs a paper shredder worker one of his customers Sylvester from eariler that day came after he found his ticket was a fake,and chased after Daffy .Sylvester experienced a fake ticket, and decided to take his rights into revenge. Daffy needed somewhere to hide. But while he was running he didn't noticed that eariler, one of the other workers acciedently spilt a large capacity of water on the floor. Daffy slipped and fell into the main shredder. Now, you would be incredibly lucky to survive, but as you can guess; Daffy didn't. He fell in and in seconds his limbs and internal organs were ripped to shreds. You could only survive a few minutes, but ten minutes later, one of his co-workers had found him and immeadiatley turned off the shredder. It was too late; Daffy shredded and the mournful shocked. We call this - Shredder Revenge ~ Number # 1 of our list. These are the dangers of life, and clumsy inheritance is defeated by death itself. Bye Daffy!' ' #2 - Strippers Salute; Sophie was a stripper in LA, Hollywood. She worked there part-time as her co-worker had an injury a week earlier when she fell alarmingly on a piece of broken glass. Being as her leg was injured, that's when Sophie had to take her place. One day she got drunk from a hen night with her best friend that had just married her boyfriend the month before. She went drowsy and fell into security at the front entrance of the strip club. Security didn't expect the fall, so security being security accidently triggered his gun, and shot her in the stomach. Unfortunatey, the nearest hospital was 12 miles away, because the one on the corner had closed earlier on in the evening. And for Sophie - that was her deathly destiny. We call this - Strippers Salute. She died 15 minutes later due to the ambulance being stuck in LA traffic. #3 - Drug Death; Stitch And Sparky were Drug dealers in Ireland..They drank illegal drugs and Alcohol. One day, they ran out of drugs, so they set up a gambing table. A clever townsperson knew he got conned when he secretley watched them deal the cards. You see, Sparky and Stitch made money because on the table laid all 4 red heart, and the people were meant to get 4 black diamond. The townsperson planned revenge and started to shout. He flipped over all 3 cards and the townspeople started a riot and chased after the drug dealers.They travelled far into the woods, but of course- they ended up dead. How? - They tripped over a tree root, and fell into a sharp branch- they impaled themselves! Just goes to show - Never take drugs, or gamble. We call this - Drug Death. Drugs= the deceased. #4 - Vodka Invasion; Fred was addicted to alcohol - any alcohol Stella Artois, Vodka, Foster ext. He had an alcholic anoymnous every Wednesday.He would go down to his friends and drink alcoholic drinks.But would this entirely become a disaster - yes it did. He entirely went drowsy and didn't noticed that he had gone up a building.And he fell 6,998 feet to the ground and it killed him. Be careful with what you do cause it can kill you.We call this- Vodka Invasion. #5 - Wild West Wasted Away; Jones was a cowboy impersonator. He did this for a living. One day, a hornet got through the air vent. It started to reproduce and make more hornets. A few weeks later, Jones had took a shower before he went on the stage. He used flower scented body wash and coconut shampoo for his hair. You see, hornets are attracted to flowery plants and fruits. We are now going to tell you about his wild west waste of a life - The hornets smelt the fresh smelling scent and went after him. Due to Jones being allergic and didn't have any eqiupment, he moved about and that made the hornets angry. To defend themselves they stung him several times because unlike the bee, they can sting more than once. He had too many stings and died in a couple of minutes due to the audience thinking it was a part of the show. #6 - Bugged; bugs bunny was a bug addict. He had tarantulas mosquitoes ants and many more.one day however he got bit by a black widow and become sick.he died six weeks later. ah bugs don't ever trust insects or they will kill you. #7-Genius go bye bye Wile e was a genius. the only problem was he was rubbish at making inventions.he would nearly get killed by one of them, but he always stays fine in the end.until one day he was chasing a chicken but forgot that had accidentally left his dynamite running.the dynamite exploded and blood went everywhere. wile e should had known that he had a problem with his inventions in the end he never find out. End credits-same as show episode 2 death has come Ahhh life can be a bitch keep watching as we show 7of today's episode deaths.a speedster runs his last run. A sailor goes for a slip and bite. 3 morons laugh themselves to death. A footballer gets the boot. A teacher has a heartattack. A comedian has her just deserved. And a rock star preform his last performance. Death is everywhere most of us to try avoid it. Others can't get out of it's way. Everyday we live we fight a new war against germs toxins injury illness and catastrophe. There's a lot of ways to wind up dead the fact that survive at all is a miracle. Because everyday we live we face a 1000 ways to die. #8- speeded out: Sonic is a speedrunner. He enjoys tormenting others about their slowness and weight. "Great job fatty. Sonic has never been disqualified because he blames it on others. But one day a race was taking place and sonic decided to signed up "I'm so gonna beat those fatties. What sonic said would his last. Now before we continue what do you think is gonna next?. He ran and ran and than fell dead. But what killed him? Well earlier that day. Sonic was exercising but he didn't notice a bullet shot from yesterday had gone through his foot. As soon as he started running the charge in the bullet exploded and caused his whole body stop working. Sonic should been less careless about fatties and more on the race. Now he's has gone with a bang. #9- shark bait: Donald is an obnoxious sailor who mops the floors for a job. He gets annoyed about it when other sailors mock and throw mud on the floor. Now Donald has lost his temper and smash his mop and attempts to stab them but slips and falls into the sea. Now the water that he landed in was shark infested and in minutes sharks appeared."help me. But the crew were long gone. He devoured in minutes. Donald should had gotten a different job in the end he died. Enjoy your time shark bait. #10 - laugh and Darth Shenzi banzai and ed are three idiotic laughers. They enjoy watching people hurt themselves and laugh at it "these people are so stupid Hahahahaha. "I know Hahahahaha."Hahahahaha. They eventually came across a video that was so funny they couldn't stop laughing and 20 hours of laughing. they died. Shenzi banzai and ed should had known they would died in the end laughter became their death. #11- footballed away: Craig is a footballer who secretly masturbates. One day a sign that said (big football match on Thursday 24 2014) "ha I'm so gonna win. "I'm gonna win this. That night he went home. And rested for tomorrow. He went to the games the next day.but as he was walking he didn't notice a ball landed in front and got stuck to his butt. Last night He didn't notice he Sat on some glue and it got on his trousers. Just then another footballer not seeing craig. Kicked him across the field and he got impaled by a goal post. Craig was a bitchy masteurbating asshole until he went down with a kick. #12-teacher attack: miss battleaxe was a horrid teacher. she was 56 and wishes she didn't get this job. On Friday she was glad and was getting ready to go home. But the kids annoyed her and she yelled and fell dead. How did this happen? Well miss battleaxe was going through a heartattack as soon as she yelled it stopped her heart and she died. Miss battleaxe was a horrid teacher who wanted a different job but instead she lost her life and died. #13- come-dian: Pepper clark is an comedian. She would work as a comedian to get money. She is a comedian and money taker in disquise. She is a dirty joker and talks to friends about lies. One night however she was found out and had tomatoes and materials thrown at her. A piece of glass of glass got stuck in her temple and her brain shut down. Oh pepper if only you didn't have to be such a bitch but now you'll never know! #14- rocked out: Niall is an selfish popstar and can be obnoxious. So he would eventually die right?. " come on you morons". He was Meanie to his band mates. Once on stage he sang life is a stripper by himself during the performance. Someone told him to do a stage dive and he toke his shirt off and jumped off the stage but noone caught him and he fell and hit the floor and died. Niall was a selfish creep who went famous Meanie to dead popstar. End credits- same as show episode 3- death has a name From organs being ripped out to falling into acid. We show you these idiotic guys being killed of course. 5 friends get blown up. A manager loses his mind. A grumpy worker gets fried. A police officer gets covered in acid. 2 sex dealers lose their lives. A stupid man goes over a cliff. And a sporty woman gets impaled. Death is everywhere most of us try to avoid it others can't get out of it's way. Everyday we fight a new war against germs toxins injury illness and catastrophe. There's a lot of ways to wind up dead the fact that we survive at all is a miracle because everyday we live we face a 1000 ways to die. #15-blown friends One time in your life you would find gangs who act idiotic. Meet (harry,Harold, freddie,William,and sim. These boys constantly do stupid things like put ash on their eyes or run across a boiling lava floor. "Hey you guys up for a challenge?". "Yes". Ok we're gonna play the click game. What is the click game you may ask? It's a game where you use a gun and see who gets the bullet. The gang go to an abandoned shack to play the game. What they don't know is that mines were planted there. the guys started playing the game. Of course there weren't any bullets in the gun. " do you guys hear that?" one of them said. "Yeah". They all looked under the table and there was a mine."Ahhhhhhh" they screamed and bang. The bomb went off and blood was everywhere. The bodies were gone. Ahh these teens these days. There was never hope for them to survive. And now Harry Harold Freddie William and sim are gone With a bang. #16- manager die hard Mr krabs is an obnoxious manager he never pays his workers (Bob and squid) his workers get angry about this and ask for money. Krabs knowing that he would be sued by them went insane and punched them and ran and then dead. But how? Well last night his workers put cocaine in his drink. As soon as he got up the cocaine reached to his brain and he died Mr Krabs never cared to pay his workers and now they have all the money in the world. #17-dead work: Squid is an grumpy worker ( who is actually from the death story that we just did) ahem. Anyway he was always mean to the customers and just was mean guy to be honest. "What would you like sir!. The customers started to get angry and chased him around the kitchen. Suddenly he slips and falls head first into a frier and dies. Never mess with a crowd squid because when you do you get fried. #18- acid officer: Officer wiggium is an lazy cop who only cares about donuts. "I love donuts. One day there is a report about crooks invading a chemical plant and wiggium is on his way. What is acid you may ask? Acid is a dangerous chemical that if touched burn your skin off. Wiggium arrives at the chemical plant and chases the crooks. He gets them and handcuffs them. "Well done myself. But just as he is celebrating he accidentally pushes a button and acid falls out and lands on top of him and dies Officer wiggium should of known he was rubbish at his job. In the end he died. And as for the crooks they were lucky and ran all to bank and then the beach. #19- red and rippy: Ren and stimpy are 2 sed dealers who ask woman to have sex with them. One day however they go to a farm and ask a farmer's daughters to have sex with them. But just their about to there is a bang and Ren and stimpy fall dead on the ground. But what killed them? Well seeing them when they came. The farmer called a hitman name Zeus. And just as they were about to hit off. He shot them and the ladies screamed and ran away. Ren and stimpy could of lived if didn't do sex but in the end the bullet always wins. #20- a death of idiotidocy: Bob is a stupid man who makes everyone annoyed. He was a rubbish driver and he always crashed. One day because of his bad driving. He went over a cliff and died. But wait where was he going? He was driving to mount Everest but couldn't stop in time and went over and died. There could have been a different ending but because of his stupidity he died. #21- rainbowpaled: Rainbow is a sports instructor and enjoys being mean to her traineers. "Keep those feet up". She is a mean person in a sports suit. One day however she had a new fat rookie name ty doing the wall climb. But he got stuck and rope flicked back and sent her into a tennis pole and she got impaled and died. Hmm rainbow should have known being mean never helps. So in the end she deserved to die. End credits- same as show episode 4-death is angry Death is a confusing thing and bloody too. Sit back and enjoy as show you 7 of today's deaths. A nerd goes blind and then dies. A biker gets his just deserves. A cocaine addict snoorks too much. A postman goes for a ride. A mechanic gets crushed. A farmer goes for a slow. And a super zero falls. Death is everywhere most of us try to avoid it others can't get out of it's way. Everyday we live we fight a new war against germs,toxins,injury,illness,and catastrophe. There's a lot of ways to wind up dead the fact that we survive at all is a miracle because everyday we live we face a 1000 ways to die. 22-Nerded out: "Max was the guy you never wanna be. "He was a nerd and a loser who always got bullied by rogues and was fed up with it that one day he was so angry he didn't see his chemicals exploded in his face he went blind in seconds and he accidentally tripped over a lab container and hit his cranium on the table so hard that it cracked his head and he died". "Well once a nerd always a nerd right max max?". 23- biker go bye bye: "See these guys motorbikes and all these are bikers what are bikers you ask their a group of thugs who drink loads of alcohol and ride on motorbikes". "Well every biker had to have a leader meet scourge the baddest dude around and pervert". "His fame got the better of him and he died". "how? He was going at 8900mph and couldn't hold on and fell hitting the ground fracturing his ribs spine and cranium and death was instant". "Scourge should of been less drunk and more careful because on this show you never live for it". Scourge didn't get that so he went from fame to bikered away". 24-cocaine slain: "Elliot was a cocaine addict he snoorked more than a one million people could and when he ran out he would steal cocaine from other addicts and snoork theirs too". "Elliot had snoorked and snoorked and snoorked until bang his snoorking days were over". "He accidentally snoorked up a explosive dust and when it reached his nose it exploded rupturing his brain and organs and he died". "Elliot was a snoorker but his snoorking addiction eventually ended his life with a boom". 25- posted off: "Pat Clinton was an average postman who like all postmen had to deliver he was to retire when they asked if he could do a big errand this made pat angry why? Because he actually hated being a postman and when they asked he got really angry and didn't notice his son's skateboard". " he accidentally stepped on it and went for a ride until smash he crashed in the Windows of his van and was embedded with shards of glass and dies". "Silly pat postman more like splatman well bye for now smash Clinton". 26-mechanicide: "